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It is the end of day #3, and I'm feeling great!  Last week this time I was eating cinnamon bagels with cream cheese... Today I'm full and on my way.  It's 9:30pm and I still have a 'meal shake' up my sleeve for later tonight before I go to bed.  That will keep my sugar under control and keep me from the jitters.

I'm implementing a new strategy today, and I know my coach has discouraged me from it, but I find it helps.  I'm going to weigh myself every day.  Knowing where I am with regards to the scale helps me focus.  I understand I will NOT be loosing weight every single day, and that is ok!  When I don't weigh myself it is easy for me to turn a blind eye and cave into eating.  When I know I've lost, even if a pound, and I'm feeling light, then I can concentrate on that and tell myself "you see? it's worth it!", rather than, "you've got until Monday to catch up"... without knowing how badly the damage is.

Case-in-point:  I'm back in the 60's today!!!
This thought gives me strength to tell myself "I'm not going backwards again". 

For 2 months now I've been struggling with getting back on a consistent trend and reaching that 'fat-burn' state.  I've been pondering and struggling with 'lost time' and calculating 'where' would I have been, had I not indulged in that wonderful FLAN Thanksgiving week...  Wonderful love-hate relationship with sugar!!!  Not any more!  I'm looking forward and telling myself I just needed a break.  The problem lays in learning to cope with real food once I reach my goal.  How will I look at food?  I don't want to tell myself I will not eat certain things again.  I love food!!! ...and who doesn't?  But there has got to be a way to be able to enjoy those foods dear to us, without breaking the scale!  My guess "sporadically" is the answer. 

DAY #2... FOR THE LAST TIME

Intense day today.  Started with so much energies and unending endurance!!!

Right now (9pm) I'm right where I find myself every-single-time... on a 'balance beam' ready to tilt either which way.  But tonight I'm sticking with it.  I have a huge headache, just ate 8 almonds, and I'm ready for bed.  If push comes to shove I'll have a ready-made chocolate shake, which works miracles at night, but I'm holding off until I'm desperate.

So I'm not off the horse tonight, NO Sir!!! Tomorrow is day #3 and I'm ready to do this.

HERE COMES THE SUN!!!

I must confess I "fell off the horse" this weekend.  Yes, day 3 and I blew it, but not necessarily on purpose, lets just say my body was in charge and my mind simply could not play defense. When our health is not optimal, factors arise which can take control of our bodies and there is nothing anyone can do.  Having a thyroid condition will do that!  So this week I'm starting again and keeping it real... until next Monday when I go for lab work and hopefully get my meds readjusted. 

In the meantime, I'm enjoying this new SUNSHINE we are getting.  Has anyone noticed it?  Every year, around this time if you live in the northern hemisphere, there's a noticeable change in the way the sun shines.  It's a crisp, bright, happy kind of sunshine which screams SPRING!!! ...even though is still freezing outside.

I'm a sunshine girl, and the strength & energy it brings to my day is amazing.

So once again I'm sticking with it, and hopefully can last a whole week (at least) with the help of this new sun.

BAD, BAD SUGAR!!!!

Day 2 has been success, although I'm having some sugar issues...

I am hypoglycemic, which means that after I eat my blood sugar levels drop and I either get jittery, dizzy, or with an uncontrollable urge to eat anything, even though physically I'm full/satisfied.  That's where am at right this second, so I'm telling myself  "Stick with it"!!!  Had my lean & green meal an hour ago and I had to munch on some extra chicken, just a few bites, because the urge was just too strong.

Also, ran out of one of my medicines 2 days ago, which resulted in a huge headache today.  I was able to get some from the pharmacy and even though the headache is gone, I'm very cranky tonight... Not a good sign when 3 little ones are roaming around!!!

So just a few more hours and I'm done with day #2.  Just a few more hours...

STICK WITH IT!

Stick with it! 
Stick with it!! 
Stick with it!!!

These are the words ringing in my ears all day... It's been very hard today and the best way to describe it would be similar to one who keeps trying to mount a horse unsuccessfully... With each failed attempt his/her strength diminishes and it's so hard to 'keep it together'.  With each day that passes, another failed attempt, and it gets harder to commit.

From experience I can tell you, once you get back on that horse it's so easy, and truly worth every drop of sweat you felt trying to get back up there in the first place. I've kept a picture of this image in my head today, telling myself (literally) to focus and stick with it, imagining that new bathing suit, that great maxi dress!!!

It's 6pm now and it's starting to feel good.. really good, but I know I'm not 'out of the woods' yet.  I've done this so many times, then, at the last minute, (somehow) a piece of "anything" finds its way into my mouth... So I'm not calling victory yet; for today, just a few more hours will do the job, and tomorrow onto day 2.

It usually takes (in this program) about 4 to 5 days to get our bodies in FAT BURNING mode, so I've got a long 'rest of the week' ahead of me, and it will not be easy.  For now though, I'm 'sticking with it'...

TSFL

Just realized some of you out there are actually reading my lame words, so perhaps this is a good time to introduce you all to the WONDERFUL system which helped me loose 50 (now 40) lbs in 4 months!!!

TAKE SHAPE FOR LIFE (TSFL), and fueled by the Medifast products.

For more info, you can contact my Health coach, Jonell Steckman, HERE

If you decide this is something you would like to look more into, let her know you found the information from "43 before 44" and she will know it came from me. 

Now, don't let my rants deter you from giving this program a try.  IT DOES WORK, and it's effortless once you get going... or else, how was I able to stick with it for 4 months?!!!  We are all individuals, and as such, we carry within us issues which only 'us' can deal with.  In my opinion, loosing weight is 90% mental, and 10% effort.  Having the right attitude is half the battle won.  For me, writing helps me get my mental focus, so that is how I plan to deal with my issue.  My coach's support and advise (whose services are FREE) has been invaluable, and having access to her has made a world of a difference.

So where am I today?  Today I did much better than yesterday, but not as great as I will do tomorrow!!!  Started the 5-1 program and by now (pm) it's getting a bit hard, but that is because I didn't drink too much water and messed up my prescription routine last night.  Needless to say, that will not happen tonight!

This road I'm in (and many of you are, as well) is a long journey... Taking short-cuts is risky and dangerous, so I'm keeping the course.

BTW:  I've noticed comments are not getting posted.  I'm looking into that.  Please continue to visit and do try to comment!  Feedback also helps. :)

QUALITY CONTROL DAY

I'm spending the day taking stock, analyzing, and loving "me" a little...

These 'ups' and 'downs' tend to send me spinning into a frenzy of guilt and emotional self-battering.  "I'm such a bad person"... my thoughts run wild:  bad wife, bad mother, bad daughter, you name it!  "I've failed at everything"... my thoughts continue:  failed childhood, failed youth, failed career, failed family-life, failed spirituality; could I be any more undeserving?

So yeah... tomorrow is another day, and by God's Will, I will conquer this!